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Influence

Click here for your worksheet on Influence.

RECOMMENDED RESOURCES
Love, Skip, Jump – Shelene Bryan
Clout – Jenni Catron
The Influence Network

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  • WHY BAD THINGS HAPPEN IN THE PRESENCE OF A GOOD GOD _ One of the biggest benefits from reading through the Bible in a year has been getting a better picture of God’s love for us. _ A few nights ago, I felt like it just hit me. This idea of bad things happening when God’s supposed to be good can be confusing but it felt so much clearer than ever before. _ Today marks the two year anniversary since Tyler’s dad died, something my human brain still doesn’t fully understand but what I do know is that our pain and the bad things that happen in the world don’t negate God’s goodness. _ If there was no free will, we’d have no sin or bad things. If God smote out bad when it was just a tiny idea in someone mind, we’d be robots or powerless to a puppet master. _ • The love of God is free will to choose who we will follow. _ • The love of God is His Word and a million little signs that point us to Him. _ • The love of God is every warning and call to obey. _ • The love of God is correction when we go astray. _ • The love of God is the way He relentlessly pursues us. _ • The love of God is not letting the bad things stay purely bad things but redeeming them in some way and using them for good. _ It’s hard to understand suffering and pain and a loving God all wrapped in one but I’m finally starting to see things I never thought were love actually are. _ We get the no pain and suffering for eternity when we respond to all His loving prompts here in a temporary place. _ This place was never intended to be heaven but there is a place, the place our Lord reigns that has no pain and suffering and evil. _ ACTION STEP: If you’re experiencing hurt and feel doubt that God is good, know that the devil wants to steer you clear of God’s loving arms. Don’t let him. You might feel mad at God but that’s exactly where we’ll find comfort. _ Pray this: Father, help me to see your love and goodness even in my hardships. Comfort me like only you can. Amen!
  • WHY I GET ANNOYED WHEN MY KIDS DON'T NAP ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I always have an agenda. Always. I always have plans and any slight deviation from that plan causes me to feel frustrated with the whining toddler or little girl who won't go to sleep. _ Last week, the girls were supposed to go back to "school" which means I was going to have 3 whole 4.5 hour work days after them being home for basically 9 weeks. And wouldn't you know, Vana got sick last week and then Vivi and that whole week back is gone. _ It's taking everything in me to take on God's view of this situation because in my head, my precious sick babies can feel like an inconvenience to what I THINK is my mission. _ The reality though? If I keep letting the Lord lead me and prune the thousands of projects and to do's I THINK I need to be doing, I realize I have enough time in my day for what He's called me too. _ If you're kids feel like they are in the way of what you need to do today, first off, I know the feeling all to well! The other day, after getting a tough email (that I shouldn't have even read in that moment), I turned my frustration on my poor daughter feeling like she was interrupting or in the way of what I thought I should be doing at the time. _ When we readjust our thinking, I think we will enjoy our time with our kids so much more and feel less anxious when we are with them. _ ACTION STEP: 1. When your frustration gets triggered today at your kids, say a quick prayer for God to clear away or give YOU the courage to clear out what He isn't calling you to do. _ 2. Follow #grumpymomhack for more tips to help you turn a midday meltdown into something refreshing and joy-filled. _ PS This week we have a motherhood series on the blog. Today I shared about when you need to STOP praying for your kids. Link in profile! I'd love to hear your thoughts! #valdoesmotherhood #letthembelittle #motherhoodissanctifying #missionalmotherhood
  • WANT MORE PASSION IN YOUR PRAYER LIFE? _ The other morning I woke up and my first thought was "Oh how I need you God!" Pretty noble right? I mean, my very first thought of the day! 💁🏻‍♀️ _ For some reason, I pulled back from that thought and just said no, I WANT YOU, GOD. This is where passion comes from. _ Yes, I will always, 100% need God. Knowing how dependent I am keeps me tethered to God in a unique way. But so does simply wanting to know Him and I miss out on this a bunch. _ There's a distinct difference (for me atleast!) in where my thoughts go after I say I want or I need God. _ I need God > Why? Because life is hard > I'm ill-equipped > I need someone to save me because I can't save myself. _ I want God > What a privilege to stand in His presence > What an amazing God > I want to know Him more. _ Notice it? _ One is mostly focused about the problem with me. One is mostly focused about who God is. _ I truly believe God calls us to feel both, but I think there's untapped passion that lies in simply starting my day wanting to know God. It's exciting. Like what will God reveal to me next instead of, let's see what you can help me do today? _ @JenWilkin's book None Like You has really changed my thinking about who God is and how beautiful His "infinite-ness" is. When I dwell on the possibility of knowing more about God each day, I get excited. _ ACTION STEP: Share something you have learned about God as you've pursued just knowing Him more OR pray right now (I promise it's worth it to pause the scroll for 20 seconds!) that God would give you a passion to simply know Him more today! _ #vmpprayer #bedeeplyrooted #valandwords #wellwateredwomen
  • THE DIRECT CONTRIBUTOR TO ANXIETY THAT MIGHT BE SLIPPING IN _ I noticed it when we came back to civilization after our month away. We certainly had the internet there but I wasn't paying too much attention to it or felt removed from it I guess. (I still owe some people text messages back). _ DRAMA _ When we returned though, I started to see how much my stress and anxiety was tied to how much drama I had access too. _ I feel torn with this whole thing. I know I can't shut off the world and what's going on around me but I think I found the boundary line for me: The people I do life with get my attention for the drama. The internet doesn't. That means if a close friend is battling an illness or divorce, I step into that and make sure I have the capacity for that heaviness so that I can love on my friend. That means I say no to filling my mind with instead the news of people I went to college with and will likely never see again. _ And the craziest part, is it's not always the heavy stuff that brings me down. I left our neighborhood FB group yesterday because hearing about all the #firstworldproblems was stealing my peace and my joy. _ We know these things steal our joy, but I truly believe they make us more anxious people too. No generation has been filled with as much anxiety as ours and I wonder how much can be attributed by our knowledge of more drama than our hearts were made to bare. _ ACTION STEP: 1. If you are serious about getting rid of your anxiety, do an experiment. As you read about drama that's two degrees removed, unfollow, mute, do whatever you need to do to not see so much. And for that matter, cut out the drama on TV too. We recently started watching reruns of a drama (a pretty tame one) and it totally messed up my good sleep and made me noticeably anxious. _ 2. Then go through our 14-Day renew challenge (or the e-book!) to fill up your mind with truth to replace the drama! Link in profile! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #vmppeaceandjoy
  • A SOLUTION TO INFORMATION OVERLOAD & A SNIPPET FROM A BRAND NEW BLOG POST _ In this whole process of living led, not driven (my words for the year), I’ve been trying to slow down and let things sink in before jumping to the next thing. This concept keeps coming up other places as well. I’m talking, the Bible. _ “[They] spent their time doing nothing but talking about and listening to the latest ideas.” – Act 17:21 _ “Of making many books there is no end, and much study wearies the body.” – Ecclesiastes 12:12 _ If we are constantly seeking new ideas, everything is staying at a shallow level. I’ve been also learning a lot about our minds and how much multitasking and screens is hindering our ability to just think. _ Enter process pairing. _ It’s not an actual real thing but what I’m calling this idea of pairing moments we learn with time to process it. _ I struggle with this idea. I want to cram more and more in but I’ve been growing so weary of my own ambition and got to experience true rest during our month away (more on that soon!). Slowing down has been a bit painful but as I get deconditioned from my own hurry, I’m seeing real benefits from a mind that has space. _ Get the steps to do this and some examples of how I'm incorporating process pairing in my every day right now ON THE BLOG! _ #valmarieblog #givemejesusjournal #wellwateredwomen #vmpjournals
  • FREEDOM TO DO WHAT? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Cover y'alls toes ladies! (I'm covering mine too!) This post isn't all fireworks, pool parties and watermelon. Although, my 4th celebrations will likely include all that. _ We toured Martin Luther King, Jr's birth home and church while we were in Atlanta and I was on the verge of tears all day long. I'm embarrassed to say, I didn't know a ton about him other than basic history. I had no idea the family he grew up in was actually pretty privileged compared to many black families in his day. Most of his family members graduated from college and his childhood home was quite nice. Vivi walked out loudly proclaiming that it was the most beautiful house she's ever seen! Now obviously any privilege he had wasn't enough to shield him from the rampant racism, hatred and segregation he experienced but what impressed me about MLK was that he used any opportunity or "privilege" for the cause of justice. His impact is enormous y'all. And I wonder what our country would be like if he hadn't chosen to use his pulpit or his voice to fight for others. _ We celebrate our vast freedoms today, but I'm selfish and honestly most years I am just grateful for how those freedoms apply to me. I haven't really realized how much that freedom is not just for me but it should be used to fight for the freedom for others too. _ 2 Corinthians 9:11 (MSG) "He gives you something you can then give away, which grows into full-formed lives, robust in God, wealthy in every way, so that you can be generous in every way, producing with us great praise to God." _ We do have freedom of speech and we can pray and have access to Bibles. That's a beautiful thing, but I know God didn't bless me with all that to keep it to myself. _ ACTION STEP: Today, let's celebrate the opportunity we have been given and prayerfully ask how the Lord wants to use us and our freedom. If you already know how God's calling you to use your freedom, share below! We'd love to be inspired by your story! #vivimaewoerner
  • ANNUAL SALE IS ON! 33% OFF ALL SOFTCOVERS Yep. That’s pretty much it. If you don’t want to miss a good deal, head to the shop now. Whatever’s in stock will be the last we print till September. - We normally close the shop in August (except for preorders!) but if we sell out before then we’ll be closed till September so if you have any birthdays, weddings, showers you need gifts for before fall, stock up now!! - Tag any friends you’ve been wanting to have as prayer accountability partners or better yet, surprise them with one. 😱😍 - P.S. International shoppers! We added a secret shopping day in the year TODAY so you can enjoy the sale too. 😘 - Pretty pic from @jordanbrittley
  • WHEN GOD IS SILENT OR SAYS "NO" _ We don't talk about "unanswered prayers" much considering how many of us feel like God is constantly staying silent or responding with a no. But sometimes it feels so complicated to address and like stuff we don't want to hear and I'm not trying to get anyone to through their phone across the room. _ But if we have any shot of growing our faith in God, we have to recognize the grace of no's instead of feeling like He willy nilly makes judgments that affect our entire earthly life without thinking it through. _ • If God gave us everything we wanted, He wouldn't be God. He'd be a puppet. • If God gave us everything we wanted (even the bad stuff we thought was good), He wouldn't be loving God. He'd be an uncaring being who didn't love me enough to tell me not to play in the middle of a busy highway. • If God gave us everything we wanted, He wouldn't be an almighty confident God. He'd be a people-pleasing, swayed by public opinion god with no integrity. _ If you are a parent, you've given no's and you've seen the reactions of a kid who just didn't understand and maybe thought you didn't love them. They might have stomped off and pouted. They might have stopped talking to you. They might have decided to do it anyway. _ Friends, let's not do that to God right now. Today's action step is big and huge and will take more than a quick minute but it's important. You with me? _ ACTION STEP: THANK GOD FOR TELLING YOU NO. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Thank God for using His INFINITE WISDOM, HIS UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, HIS NEVER-CEASING CHARACTER to not giving in when finite beings like us think we have a better idea. No's are not a fluke. They are not a sign He checked out or loves you less than someone else who got what you wanted. They are full of grace. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ P.S. I'm pretty sure every one of us has heard or felt a "no" lately. Tag a friend or two who needs hope facing the disappointment. #prayer #vmpprayer #valandwords
  • BURDENS YOU CAN RELEASE RIGHT NOW _ Me and my sister had to go see a counselor one time. I was pregnant 🤰 with Vivi and @nataliemetlewis was dating boys I didn’t approve of and not shutting up about it to her. _ Maybe you have someone in your life you are extra hard on because you feel responsible for them. It’s hard watching them make choices you don’t agree with. But it wasn’t just hard. I felt like it was JOB to “set her on the right path” according to me. I felt this weight on my shoulders and personal responsibility to fix things. _ Hearing a counselor free me from that responsibility in a Biblical way healed our relationship like I can’t explain. _ If you’ve offered the advice. If you’ve voiced your opinion, you have to let God do the rest and not feel like your the judge and jury. I believe God calls us to accountability, but it’s a slippery slope to constant, unrelenting advice. I thought I was doing my job as a Christian sister but after a few times, I was actually hindering her from hearing from the Holy Spirit. _ ACTION STEP: 1. Root out any relationships that are suffering and see if any good intentions got twisted up into a responsibility that isn’t really yours. And then release it! I can’t tell you how quickly we healed and how much less burden I felt when I trusted God to speak to speak to her. 2. If you haven’t checked out me and @nataliemetlewis’s two-part interview with @friendsofafeatherpodcast check it out! I’ll post link in profile!

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