I was reading an email from my life coach, Diana Kerr, a few weeks ago and she shared the #1 request kids have for their parents.
If you’re like me, you may have assumed quality time.
But that wasn’t it. Want to know what it is? Here’s what Diana said:
Kids #1 request is for their parents to be less stressed and tired. (Source 1 / Source 2)
Now, there are multiple studies on this, and one of the studies relates specifically to working parents, but there’s also a study cited in Source 2 that showed that “the single most determining factor for how well adjusted a child turns out is the mother’s emotional health.”
This was true for working moms AND stay-at-home moms! …
It is critically important that we use our God-given ability to manage our stress and emotional state for not just our own sake, but the sake of the people around us.
Why am I sharing this? Because when I wrote Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday, it was for you, Mom. It wasn’t a book on parenting or how to be a better mom for your kids. It was for how you as mom walked through the experience of motherhood. It was for the mom who wanted to enjoy her kids more and not let her motherhood be determined by the way the world’s stereotype of it.
And I knew if we were less grumpy, surely it would affect our kids, but I had no idea it was one of the things our kids desired for us most.
As I read that email, I was challenged all over again to think about how I think, especially when it comes to motherhood.
But figuring out what stresses us out as moms, like really practically trying to make changes in something so complex feels futile. Why? Because:
1. There’s truthfully a lot of little things, not just one easy to point to issue.
2. We’ve been conditioned by the world to believe it’s the inescapable part of motherhood.
3. Even if we do figure it out, we can’t actually change it so why bother?
I get it more than I could articulate in a little blog post! I wish you could have seen my sad little melancholy heart as I prepared for motherhood, with a sweet Vivi in my belly. Anxious does not begin to express my feelings. God was so gracious though and put a spark in me to help me figure out the specifics of what caused me to feel stressed, tired and anxious. And more than that? He sparked a hope in me that I could be a joy-filled momma no matter what the circumstances. And the “how” is actually pretty simple. We need to overwhelm our thoughts with God’s view of motherhood instead of the stereotypes and the memes the world shows us.
If we believe motherhood is only yoga pants, dreaded Target trips with a toddler, being a chauffeur, dry shampoo-crusted hair then is it any wonder we’re stressed?
In Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday, we talk about 20 different stereotypes that we need to recognize and the truth we need to replace it with. The simple act of discovering these harmful stereotypes has transformed so many mommas over the last year (come back later this week to read about some!) and I’m sharing this again because I know it can help you, too.
This unique quarantine season has had me reaching for my copy so I can refresh in what I know to be true and the joy it’s inspired is almost instantaneous. Not because the words are brilliant but because truth has the power to transform us.
And the most amazing thing is, as we let truth transform us from stressed mommas to joy-filled and patient, our kids get a front-row seat and my prayer is that they’d learn that their worth isn’t determined by what the world tells them about life but about what God says instead.
Grab a copy of Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday in our shop or on Amazon.
Want a little taste first? Check out our Bible app reading plan here!
Thank you for sharing a snippet of that email! 🙂 Love you! Thanks for encouraging me in this mental game soooo much!