Book Club // Friendship, Part 2

Hi Friends!! It’s implementation week for our chapter on Friendship from The Finishing School. (Join our FB group here!)

Today I am sharing a few of my answers to the homework and prepping for a week of taking action on everything I learned last week.

A few questions from the homework:

What holds you back? 

I dug a bit into this question last week but thought of another reason while I was working on the homework.

I have a little bit of social anxiety. I was headed to a get-together with some ladies a few months ago and only knew one or two of the girls that would be there. On my way to the event, I started panicking and getting heart flutters and nearly turned around but didn’t. Probably more because my fear of girls I didn’t know was less than my fear of explaining why I bailed. ; )

It got me thinking how scary it can be to put yourself out there and how sometimes we feel like it’s just better, or at the very least less anxiety-inducing to get out of your comfort zone. I was so glad I ended up going! I got to talk with several new and old friends and as silly as it sounds, practice the art of talking to people, which happens far less these days.

In college, I remember meeting new people everyday and my role as a reporter for our newspaper meant I was also reaching out to sources 9-10 times a week so I had plenty of practice of making conversation. This reminded me that getting comfortable meeting new people is a muscle we need to stretch. Mine atrophied as went from chatty college reporter to work from home mom so it’s something that I’ll need to build back up and make an intentional effort to get out of my comfort zone.

What ways can you cultivate a friendship? What does it mean to love like Jesus?

I have been reading the book You’re Going to be OK by Holley Gerth (which I HIGHLY recommend!) and she happened to mention qualities of a “one another” friendship. One another meaning, not one above or below the other but what the Bible describes as true friendship based on this phrase that pops up. She gave 11 traits and some thoughts to think on that were perfect for this chapter so if you want to keep digging, read these verse she shared and think on the questions!

1. Love (John 13:34) – What’s one way I’m loving others?
2. Devotion (Romans 12:10) – What’s one way I’ve been there for someone else through his or her highs and lows?
3. Honor (Romans 12:10) – What’s one way I honor others and consider their needs before my own?
4. Harmony (Romans 12:16) – What’s one way I value the differences of others and appreciate how God made them?
5. Acceptance (Romans 15:7) – What’s one way I am a safe person for others in my words, thoughts and actions?
6. Instruction (Romans 15:4) – What’s one way I’m sharing life with others as well as learning from their thoughts and experiences?
7. Encouragement (2 Corinthians 13:11) – What’s one way I encourage others?
8. Service (Galatians 5:13) – What’s one way I’m serving others?
9. Kindness (Ephesians 4:32) – What’s one way I show kindness and compassion to others?
10. Forgiveness (Colossians 3:13) – What’s one way I’ve extended forgiveness to others?
11. Hospitality (1 Peter 4:9) – What’s one way I show hospitality to others?

What do you wish your friendships looked like? 

In my head, the answer went something like this: “Coffee shop chats, dinners around the table, praying together…”. This answer is well and good but I want a friendships that encompass the 11 traits above that are based on Scripture. I think it would certainly involve meals and prayer but I know I can have these friendships without the heart so I want to start at the heart of friendship.

How are you taking action and growing friendships this week?